Video transcript:

In coaching, whenever I hear the word 'need'
then that puts me on guard, alarm bells ring
and I want to challenge it,
or at least help the coachee make sense of that.
Because need implies some kind of 'should'
or 'have to' or 'must' in some way.
The need is coming external from
the coaching client.
The implication is that there are some
rules outside the coachee that you're
working with that implies they
must have to do something
or need to do something.
What I want to do, and a very simple thing
I do when I hear the word need,
say a client says,
"I need to be better at presenting",
for example.
I say just replace that word need
with the word want and say that sentence again.
And they say, "I want to be better at presenting".
I get them to notice the difference and
now we've got a discussion going.
Ok, do they need to be better at presenting
but more importantly do they want to?
Are they committed to doing something
different about it?
Hope that's helpful. Needs and wants.
Watch out for...